Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Engaged Parenting

Recently I read an article about engaged parenting. It really hit home for me, because although I am a stay at home mom and have my children with me all day and all night, some times I disassociate myself from the going ons around the house to feel like I can regroup and survive all the madness.

Since reading the article I have made a real effort to be more engaged and present with the boys play time. We wrestle, or as Jaxon says, "Let's freak out!" together more on the bed almost daily again, and things like dancing to the music cheek to cheek has once again become a favorite for the boys (and I). We are back to playing games in the car to keep happy chatter going instead of keeping the music on to drown out their arguing.

The level of the boys frustration and argumentativeness over trains has come down quite a bit. Partly because I am engaging them in other activities with me, and the fact that they are happier since I have been happier just from spending more time engaging with them, not just surviving with them. Like the article says, I am also working on my responses to their situations, not just reacting to the situations. I am trying to remember the cues of their behavior and trying to head off a situation before it gathers heat and anger, and usually it works.

Most of all, I am just thankful for that article. It reminded me that I had stepped a bit off the parenting path I wanted to be on and it has helped me appreciate the boys more every day. Appreciate their humor, kindness and abilities. With my level of being overwhelmed being in check, it has made a significant difference in their level of happiness.

In just the past few weeks that I have been making more of an engaged effort with the boys, I have noticed so much more about them, and just am amazed at the sweet and smart little people they are becoming. I am such a blessed Momma and am so thankful for the new eyes I have been given.


Andrea said...

Awesome reminder for all of us as we start this new year of parenting. Although I've never met you in "real life", from your blog I gather that you are already a wonderful mother to your very lucky little boys.

Anonymous said...

You will totally cherish those moments when you don't have them wish they were back as I do.....<3Tami

Jessica said...

Just came across your blog and I'm glad I did. I am a stay at home mom too and have to remind myself to try to be in the moment. One of these days we won't have all of these sweet moments with our little ones!